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  • Writer's pictureEmily Royce


The inspiration for what I write came in waves and it is jostling all around inside of me. What may seemingly be discombobulated on paper makes sense within so here goes.

I am in a place often referred to as The Motherland. It carries a mysticism to it in the Western world, perhaps because so few visit. I am told, mostly by men here, that there is a deep respect for women. They create and nurture life after all. Yet I am in a country where allegedly the majority of adult female women have had their genitals mutilated.

I am attempting to come out of a relationship where my former partner, one of the many who has said women take the place of utmost respect, simply says that he decided that we would be together forever so he is not going to give me up. My desires for what I want are second to his love, his possession of me.

I come from a country where women are so regularly harassed and abused that we scoff at one another for bringing it up. I saw a meme today that suggested an unabused woman was like a unicorn.

This all has me thinking, clearly I want to live in a world where these blatant attacks on the sacredness of women are not tolerated. BUT ALSO, I want deep deep adoration to take it’s place.

Because when I made the first round of calling it off with this lover yesterday, I immediately missed the calls I was rolling my eyes at days before. I kept checking texts to see if he had sent more poems or photos trying to win me back. And when there was not enough of this, I began pining for a former lover that I had surely transitioned past a month ago. Suddenly the faults forgotten and the fantasies in full swing. I had a dream last night about him and the message was so clear, it wasn’t him I was ever after, I wanted him to SEE me and ADORE me for all that I am.

Mama Gena wrote a book called “Pussy: A Reclamation” recently (read it.) It’s simple in it’s revolutionary. A woman run by desire, a woman turned on, is a woman that can do anything.

“Cliteracy is the observation and study of the laws of what turns us on. When you study what turns a woman on, you are making sure that the atmosphere, the biosphere, the growing conditions that she needs to thrive, are met. Both on the inner and the outer.

Cliteracy Rule #1: She loves acknowledgement, praise, worship, and appreciation.

Cliteracy Rule #2: She hates criticism, being rushed, being yelled at, being ignored.

Cliteracy Rule #3: She who owns the pussy holds the power.

Cliteracy Rule #4: She takes the time she takes—for very good reasons.”

I don’t think this is Western indulgence. I don’t think having your clit rubbed or being praised are superfluous to existence. I think they are requirements for women to thrive. And if women are not thriving, this whole life force as we know it will be snuffed out.

We all need to be appreciated as humans. But I believe the requirement is bigger for women. I think we desire, and deserve, adoration. So let’s bring it. Let’s count the ways in which we honor, love and appreciate every sexy nuanced thing we do. Let’s not rush each other or be harsh. Let’s be soft and juicy and welcoming for all of us to receive all that it is we are worthy of. DEEP GODDESS ADORATION. For holding this world together. For always bringing the love and peace. For seeing nature and speaking to her sweetly. For giving life and nurturing life. For every damn thing that would be total shit without a woman. Let there not be a day that passes where we do not see and adore us and THAT my friends, will totally flip this toxic masculinity world on it's divine lunar axis.

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